There is something calling me to be still.
This is both frightening and strange yet I know in another part of myself that this call is daring me to move into a new phase of being my authentic self. I’ve always been someone who has felt pressured to be on the move. It’s hard to be still when I’m pulled by goal setting, self-development, and the pursuance of my passions.
What I’ve learnt though is that the majority of the pressure is internal, I set personal deadlines and place high expectations on myself – so part of being still has been learning to let go of the self-imposed stress and offering a good dose of compassion to the part of me that believes life is going to fall apart if I stop putting this kind of pressure on myself.
Part of being still has been learning that I don’t always have to move to progress. It’s about calming my mind and stopping myself from the mental to-do lists, the incessant worries, the getting lost in should-have’s and what-ifs. Stillness is about the ability to be comfortable with uncertainty, the discomfort of limbo, the difficult emotions. To be able to sit alone in a room with the fullness of my own being.
I’ve learned that I can get so distracted by tasks, material possessions, other people’s opinions and expectations, and unnecessary conflict that I get pulled away from all of the things that are important in my life. I have a habit of colouring stillness as missed time, a lack of motivation, or laziness, and what I’m learning is that stillness is not stagnation.
Stillness is about slowing down so I don’t miss out on where I’m heading. And so I sit, or I stand, or I walk without having something to do or somewhere to be. Stillness is about breathing and it’s about being – it’s as difficult and simple as that.
Can you relate?
With great warmth