I’ve often wondered how many times I need to say this to myself before the self-acceptance kicks in. I’ve spent way too much of my time on this beautiful planet feeling like I’m not enough. Not beautiful enough, not fit enough, not smart enough, not creative enough, not organised enough, not accomplished enough, not productive enough, not fulfilled enough…and I’ve believed that I have to quiet the not enough-ness before I can accept myself. But this can be just another thing about myself that I believe I have to fix. And when I feel like I need fixing it’s very hard to accept myself.

What I’ve discovered is I don’t need fixing I need kindness. When I can turn to myself, especially in those moments of not enough-ness, with some kindness, with some gentleness for the tender places where these feelings of not enoughness emerge then self-acceptance seems to simultaneously arise in that moment. It is quite a beautiful process. It’s also felt like a counter-intuitive process to that part of me that believes being kind to myself means giving up or settling, throwing in the towel. But what I’ve discovered is accepting myself is about having my own back and never abandoning myself AND wanting the best for myself in the long term. Self-acceptance arises when I’m kind with myself not when I’m trying to fix myself so that self-acceptance can follow. Can you relate?

With great warmth Heather

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